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The Decision



Confused
Torn in two
Longing for easy answers, something simpler
Searching for a knowing I know I can depend on
Desiring what is good
When goodness is a slippery thing
Hard to grasp.

 So far from formulae
What seemed obvious in the abstract
Is all shadow play
Heart-searching
Head pounding
Stomach churning
Who knew doing the ‘right’ thing
Would feel so wrong
Whichever way you look at it?

 Wrong. 
I could live with wrong on my account
But I look in her eyes and feel
Her life is forever changed
By my choices
My idea of ‘right’ choices
My right thinking about grey ideas
Ideas that are grey
The shadowlands of truth.

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